Good luck editing, I can’t wait to read another sample of the story.

I totally get what you’re saying about back story, but I think what I’m using the wrong words to describe it. It’s more of a time piece, the story starts when the two major characters are in school - think Harry Potter sort of; At the end of part one, they part ways, and part two picks up about five or ten years later.

Does that make sense?

So it’s not really backstory it’s more, “If you think that was crappy wait till you see them a little later. Their lives really suck now.

I expect I’ll get one of these chapters up on the web in the next few weeks. Either one of them would make a good excerpt, but I’ll have to take the time to decide which one I’d rather put out to the public and which one I’d rather spend the time editing right now.

As an aside, you mention that the first “part” of your story is basically back story. This worries me. If there’s been one thing I’ve been taught at all of the writing conferences I’ve been to, it’s to start the story at the start of the story, the history and backstory can come later. If you ask your readers to wade through a few chapters of setup before getting to the real conflict, you’re bound to lose a good chunk of them.

Way cool. Now that’s the chapter I want to read!

… sounds like my first stint in college …

Very cool! Sounds like the chapters would be an interesting read. Post one up!

I feel your pain with Chapter 12. I’m currently writing Chapter 14 in my little shtick and it’s proven to be the hardest by far. I’ve split the story up into “parts” and the first one basically being back story, but this chapter is the “end game” for the first part, so it’s proven quite challenging.

Stick with it!!!

Mark

Let me just say, though, that the real ending involves an operatic singer, sixteen double cheeseburgers, a shaved cat and a party hat.

But that’s all I’m saying….

It would be easy to say she gets called up to the big bosses office where he tells Lucy that the fruit-fucker she works for is a douche and she’s brilliant and he’s fired and she’s now the new fruit-fucker.

But that would be easy.

Now if you’re a nerdcore kind of asshole then when Lucy enters her office the boss will turn into a thirty foot fire breathing dragon and devour her for her incompetence. This will keep the other weaklings in line for a few more months, so everyone wins. Except, of course, Lucy. Cause she’s dead.

If you’re a Star Wars kind of asshole then the boss reveals that he’s really a Sith Lord and Lucy pulls out her Light Saber and they go at it, but Aidan writes dialog too good for that.

So… hell anything could happen, really. This is Aidan - effing - Moher we’re talking about.

hahahahahaha

See, now THAT’S why I read this site. So Great.